I said I wouldn't use names but there's some wiggle room here. I had matched this girl on Tinder, she definitely had a celebrity's name and yet so common of a name, if you ran a google search for "that name" you'd probably come across 10,000 searches. Hell, I tried to find her with first and last name alone on Facebook and even knowing her school and more and I never found her profile. So I'd say we're safe.
We're going way back. Still a virgin by this point (kinda) I match this girl and she wants to come over. Cool. She comes, I bring her to my room. We talk and chill but she gets all mystical. She tries to a palm reading on me. I wasn't that clueless back then. Even I knew this was a ploy for her to touch me and get physical. So I let her hold my hands and then I just go in for the kiss, we start making out, things get hot but maybe it should of not. I'm still a virgin at this point at least by means of penetration or intercourse. And this girl wants to have sex. At this point I didn't care let me give it up to some random Tinder chick with no formal date involved. So she takes off her pants and I just lay there.
Here's the part where I write a erotica or a joke. Because I shit you not, I cannot make up this shit, literally.
As she's there naked there's this strong odor of poop. Like she took a shit , didn't wipe or clean up and came right to my place. At the time I thought no better of the situation. I just thought sex was supposed to be smelly, I mean it dealt with our smelliest and dirtiest parts so I thought it was a logical assumption. It was very underwhelming experience. She rode me for like less than 10 minutes and it wasn't even passionate it was as if she was simply sitting on me. There wasn't any position changes or anything. Hell, if that was sex then I definetly didn't want any more of it. I wouldn't know better or actually get a real ride until much later, cue the Venezuelan Little Mamas. Either way I put my pants back on and that's that. We stayed in touch for a while but things faded off. I guess she still has my socials but she barely logs on or is active, so I don't expect to hear from her anytime soon. I'll add extra blur to this photo. This was quite the embarrassing story to tell. But every story has it's origins.
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